Brain Drippings

On the radio yesterday I heard that the CIA is refusing to release Osama Bin Laden’s adosama-bin-ladenult film collection.  This, I believe is a mistake.  I think we could learn a lot about the criminal mind by poking through their personal items.  Especially if it’s all contained on VHS.  Having said that, (I hate that phrase) I like cheese.  Actual cheesfreeze-cheesee, not the pre-packaged, processed milk product that tries to disguise itself as cheese.  That will not do.  For example:  Cheddar cheese is actual cheese.  American (cheese) is not.  Swiss cheese is real cheese.  Mozzarella is not.  Now, I understand that there’s a slight bit of controversy surrounding the last because of its affiliation with pizza.  Just because it tastes good doesn’t make it cheese.  Speaking of cheese…

Yesterghostday evening, my wife was in the upstairs bathroom coloring her hair.  My daughter and I were downstairs on the couch binge watching My 600lb life, when from the corner of my eye, I saw someone enter the kitchen.  Now, at first I thought it was my wife so I called out to her, but she immediately answered from the upstairs bathroom.  A chill ran through me and I felt the hair on my arms bristle.  What had I just seen?  I feel obligated to note that I have been on an acid reducer for two weeks due to chronic IBS with diarrhea and occasional constipation.  1_8ozPeptoOriginaltumblr_mak2nkawYT1rebih1o1_1280

Which brings me to my next dripping. My dog Roxy has odd eating habits.  She eats her own food but is more interested in other things.  Like shoes, phone chargers, glasses, and my memory foam pillow.  However, her latest craving has been cat poop.  Unlike like Ron Burgundy, she takes it from the litter box without a fuss.  She tries to hide it like a crack smoker during a drug raid.  She jumps up onto the couch and savors it like a tender piece of meat.  Sick puppy.  That will be all for today.  “I have to go rub cocoa butter on my man-boobs.”  Peace.

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